I did not take any long, exotic trips this year, but I did manage to travel out-of-state several times for family functions. On the way home from one trip I made a slight detour and drove through Price (Utah), so that I could stop at Utah State University Eastern - home of the world famous USU Eastern Prehistoric Museum.
When I arrived at the University, I was surprised to find that the museum was closed. I could see a security guard inside when I looked through the glass door, so I kept knocking on the glass until he opened the door. The guard explained that the museum was closed due to the COVID-19 pandemic and I could not come inside. After pleading with him and explaining that I had driven all the way from Las Vegas just to see the museum, he agreed to allow me to come into the lobby and take some pictures. However, I was not allowed to tour the museum.
It turned out that the security guard was really a nice guy. While we were walking around the lobby looking at exhibits, he told me that he was not an epidemiologist, but he had a new theory about extinction of the dinosaurs. Since there were no tourist visiting the museum, and it was very quiet in the building, he had time to think and do his own research. He had analyzed existing data in the museum using a Pearson's Correlation Test and discovered some interesting results that he was going to discuss with the paleontologists when they returned. His results showed a strong correlation between the COVID-19 virus and dinosaur deaths. Therefore, he concluded that the dinosaurs did not die from a large meteor striking the earth, but they died from COVID-19, and other complications associated with the virus.
After examining dinosaur bones from the Wuhan Dinosaur Quarry, the security guard realized that the virus originated in a Sauropod species known as Newsomasaurus that was just recently discovered in China.
His research indicated that at the time the dinosaurs contacted the virus, Fauciasaurus was in charge of the continent (there was only one continent at that time) and immediately declared a virus emergency and shut down everything. All species were ordered to do social distancing and all species were required to wear masks all of the time, which probably killed off a number of dinosaurs. No dinosaurs were allowed to eat other dinosaurs or plant materials in public, even if they were dining outside. It was found that the virus killed the old dinosaurs first, which explains why few juvenile bones are found today and most dinosaur bones in museums are from adults.
The security guard concluded that the Antifasaurus group, most of whom did not even know what they were mad about, started forming large groups that gathered together without masks to riot, destroy monuments, spray paint graffiti on everything, and burn down the rain forest where they lived. This caused even more problems in the swamp, including air pollution from all of the carbon atoms. To cope with the stress, some dinosaurs started smoking weeds and drinking fermented liquids. Then they came down with lung diseases and liver problems that killed off even more species. Social gatherings were not allowed. Adult dinosaurs had to work from home. Youngsters could not attend school. There were few leisure activities available - no movies, no restaurants, no bars, no concerts, no professional sports, and to make matters worse, all of the ski slopes were closed due to climate change. To take out their frustrations, domestic violence increased, which killed off the weaker species.
The security guard's research also showed that the COVID-19 virus affected species differently. Some species were very vulnerable to the virus and became extinct almost immediately, while other species were less affected and lived for millions of more years. As a matter of fact, the Horseshoe Crab, turtles, and alligators were so resistant to the virus that their species are still alive today. Even though most of the dinosaurs did not survive COVID-19, let us hope that we all make it through this pandemic!
Wishing everyone a Happy, Healthy, and Prosperous New Year!
Ronnie
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BONUS PICTURE
On Monday evening, December 21, I was out shopping for a new phone and when I returned home there was a strange man standing at my front door. The man saw me drive up and immediately ran to an unmarked white van that he had left running at the curb. He sped away before I could talk to him.
I checked the front door and noted that the man had not been able to break into the house; however, there was a small package that had been placed on the Welcome mat.
About the same time, I looked up and saw a bright light in the southwest part of the sky. The light was brighter than any star that I have ever seen; so I suspected that it must be some type of alien spacecraft. Probably checking to see if I received the package.
When I examined the package, the first thing I noted on the outside of the wrapper was "Men - Black." No other indications of where the package came from. Now I'm no dummy and I know all about the "Men In Black" that protect us from space aliens; so I deduced that the package was something secret shipped to me from MIB.
Once inside of the house, I closed all of the window shades and opened the package. Inside was a small plastic pouch that contained what appeared to be a pair of secretly coded socks. I realized the socks must contained some type of telemetry equipment because they glowed in the dark. Looking at the calendar I noted that Friday would be December 25. This date is significant because when you add the even integer 2 to the prime number 5, the sum of the two numbers produces the prime number "7." Even more importantly, the next sequential prime number is "11." Now, everyone in Las Vegas knows the significance of the prime numbers "7 & 11."
Therefore, I put on my new socks this morning and I'm now hiding in the bedroom closet with my laptop computer and cell phone waiting for further instructions about my first 2021 RonnieAdventure assignment. Stay tuned!!!!
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